The story of National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day began with an awareness movement in the United States. In 1988, President Ronald Reagan officially designated October as Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. His proclamation looked to shine a light on the experiences of families who had suffered the heartbreak of losing a baby during pregnancy or infancy, and also the silent grief that follows these losses.
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), approximately 1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage, and around 1 in 160 result in stillbirth. Yet despite these numbers, the pain of such losses can feel isolating, hidden away in a society that rarely discusses these difficult subjects openly.
This day gives families a chance to honor the memory of their babies, opening the door to shared grief and collective healing. It’s also a time for communities to recognize the invisible pain many carry.
International Wave of Light
A powerful tradition on this day is the International Wave of Light, a global remembrance event. Families, friends, and communities are invited to light candles at 7 p.m. in their local time zones, creating a “wave” of light that moves around the world. These flickering flames remind us of the babies who left this world too soon. The lighted candles create a moment of beauty and unity, symbolizing that the loss, while deeply personal, is shared by many. This global act of solidarity can be incredibly comforting for those grieving, offering a tangible reminder that they are not alone in their grief.
Breaking the Silence
In our culture, pregnancy and infant loss are often wrapped in silence. Many parents feel they must grieve privately, sometimes feeling as though they’re expected to “move on” quickly. National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day challenges that silence, encouraging open conversation about loss, grief, and the emotional toll that comes with it. This day is an opportunity for families to tell their stories and for society to listen and truly hear and honor the pain that comes with the loss of a child. It’s also an opportunity for those who may not understand this grief to learn how to offer empathy and support to friends and loved ones who are grieving.
Organizations like the March of Dimes and Pregnancy After Loss Support (PALS) provide resources, advocacy, and support for those affected by pregnancy and infant loss. They work tirelessly to raise awareness and improve public understanding of this complex grief, from advocating for policies that support grieving families to sharing stories that humanize the statistics. The hope is that through awareness and education, we can foster a more compassionate society, one that acknowledges the depth of this loss and stands with families in their grief.
The heartbreak of losing a child during pregnancy or infancy may never fully go away, but by coming together to remember, we can keep their memories alive. And in doing so, we can find comfort and strength, knowing that we are united in both grief and hope.